Last week my uncle John Irick passed away suddenly of a heart attack.  I didn't know John as well as I would have liked, but he was a gentleman and a very intelligent person.

I flew down to attend his funeral because he was family and it seemed a meaningful gesture to my aunt Naeda and my cousins JS (John Stockton) and Alyssa. It was a good visit even though it was a sad occasion, and I was again impressed by another of my fathers siblings who was so obviously intelligent and vibrant.

If I say this as though a stranger, it would be mostly true. It had been many years since I had seen Naeda and John. My father's family broke up back in the days when divorce was not common, especially among Catholic families. Sometimes events like these can leave strained relations and hurt feelings that linger long generations after the fact.

As a result, when I was growing up I didn't really get to know some of my relatives. My father's family is a collection of the most talented, intelligent, and passionate people you are likely to meet. It was a privilege to spend time with Naeda and her kids, my cousins, and to relate to them what I had learned and experienced from my own fathers death. Ironically, JS and I were the same age when our fathers died.

Sometimes you want to say something but you don't know how it will be heard, what preconceptions people will place on your words because of history or whatever. In those situations it has worked best for me to listen to my heart and go with what I deeply feel. A person may sometimes act the fool with the words they speak, but if those words are obviously from the heart, in my experience anyway, people mostly give you the benefit of the doubt because they see your intentions are good.
As 2nd Proverbs says: "the Lord gives us wisdom, and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding. He holds victory in store for the upright, he is a shield to those whose walk is blameless, for he guards the course of the just and protects the way of his faithful ones."

I've always understood this to mean that if you have good intentions and try to follow what you know in your heart is right, you will be watched over and guided.

The next morning I had a 3 AM wake-up call so I could get to the airport early for my 6 AM flight back to Detroit. It was 4:15 AM when I reached the Raleigh-Durham Airport and it was deserted and I had no coffee in my system.

I stood at the NorthWest Airlines counter solo about 15 minutes when another traveler showed up. She was heading to Champagne-Urbana to be with her mother who was dying of complications from Emphysema. We talked awhile about that and about how nasty cigarettes are (she and I both used to smoke them) and about my wife's grandmother who used to get the nursing home employees to buy her smokes and she'd hide them in her clothes drawers.

About this time another 25 or so people suddenly appeared. They all got in the regular line so I didn't notice them all immediately as I was standing in the Elite line, which really just means that I fly quite a bit and flying too much can make people cranky so the airlines give you a faster line just in case.

After all the customers appeared I began to see signs of life from the other side of the counter. The NorthWest Airlines employees began popping in for a moment to load tickets into printers and such; all the stuff to get ready to help their customers get from A to B. Suddenly the crowd was straining at the leash; we could all sense the impending start of customer service.  Then THEY appeared.

It was almost freakish.  One moment everyone was behind the lines which demark the "being helped" from the "being helped wannabes".   Just as the first NW Airlines employees looked as though she might call out in her clear voice "Can I help the first person in line?" there was a trio of people there in front of everyone blocking all three lines. Two of them were small elderly persons dressed in the manner of someone from India and they weren't saying anything but they looked worried. The young man, obviously their son from his demeanor, was appropriating the entire customer service complex and he didn't even have the ticket with the next number being served printed on it. I remember thinking that Germany had it's advantages. Such an action there would be unthinkable, they probably have special SWAT teams that rapidly deploy in such unthinkable circumstances.

I admit I was a bit bogued out by the whole line jumping and lane hogging thing, but it was still early so I just minded my own business and bided my time. Soon enough they would be served and I could get my bag checked and go find out if the NW lounge was open at 5 AM. They have coffee there you see, and free high speed internet. At least for the first several minutes I thought that. After that I was at first surprised and then a bit irritated to see that they were STILL hogging all three lines with the son standing over them like a lion defending it's kill from a pack of hyenas. I switched my ear/brain interface on and started listening to the escalating conversation to try and understand what the heck was going on.

After a couple more minutes the situation was clear. The elderly people were indeed the younger mans parents. They were from India and they neither spoke nor could read English. One or both of them were flying to somewhere in India and the son was very concerned about them making the transfer from one flight to the next in Detroit.

The airline employee kept trying to explain to the younger man that they couldn't provide Hindi speaking escorts to get them from one terminal to another for free. It wasn't a language they supported like that, he would have to pay a $100.00 fee and make arrangements in advance. He kept bringing up the promises made over the phone by some anonymous NorthWest employee about the transfer and he wasn't acting like he felt the fee was appropriate.

After another 5 minutes or so dragged by it suddenly occurred to me that he wasn't going to give up and the airline employee couldn't agree to his demands which included letting him beyond the secure barrier into the vitals of the airport so he could personally escort them to their gate.

Like I said, I fly quite a bit. I recognized the look on the airline employees face, it was that deer in the headlights look that says this guy is getting too aggressive and I can't help him because it's against rules that none of us can break. In case you didn't already know this, the airlines have rules and they have RULES.   RULES are never, ever broken ... rules sometimes are. Wherever the elderly people were going they clearly were not going to be leaving Raleigh-Durham except maybe in cuffs if the son pushed the counter employee a little harder. Airlines are so terribly humorless these days.

With an air of entitlement only possible from someone standing in the (blocked) Elite line I stepped forward and asked what the problem was. I didn't ask him, I asked her because we shared a bond: I fly NW frequently and she deals with people flying NW frequently. Clearly we had something in common. Also of course I wanted the line to start moving and at that moment there were probably few things she wanted more than that same thing.

She explained again that the elderly woman was flying to somewhere in India and had to transfer in Detroit. The son spoke up and said his mother couldn't make it through Detroit Airport without help and he wanted the airline to keep the promise the nameless person on the phone had made. We were lining up to go around the whole argument again.

I forestalled that dire possibility by saying, "Look this woman can't violate TSA guidelines and allow anyone without a ticket into the secure part of the airport. No matter what you say to her she can't agree to that, she just doesn't have the authority to make that decision and neither does her boss." The NW employee nodded vigorously, obviously relieved that someone understood that part of her dilemma.

The younger man started to repeat his litany again about the promises that were made to him when suddenly the answer to this problem popped into my brain and the words came unbidden out of my mouth. I didn't even think first, I just opened my mouth and said, "I will take responsibility for your relative." The younger man and the counter person both looked at me like I had just said, "The crayon is purple" or something likewise unexpected and indecipherable. I pulled out a business card and gave it to the son and said, "I'm flying to Detroit too. I fly through Detroit Metro all the time. I know the airport very well and I promise you she will make her connection safely. You just need to explain to her that I will wait for her when I get off the plane at the door and will walk her to the correct gate."

He looked a bit uncertain, but giving him the card was the right thing to do. He had my name, and he could see I was a business traveler. He agreed, the counter person was relieved, and the people in the line behind our little negotiation team all said nice things about my offer.

I checked my bag and waited for the trio. She didn't check her bag, wanting to carry it on. The other two people disappeared down an escalator waving goodbye to her and the little woman was hurrying to catch up with me.

As we neared the security checkpoint it suddenly dawned on me that I was escorting someone obviously from another country who couldn't speak any English and had a carry on. Oops. What if they questioned her? Geeze TSA loves to do that. Would they settle for her answering in Hindi that she didn't understand them, and my assurances that the little lady in the Sari was harmless? Heck I'd known her almost 10 minutes.

Life is so hard sometimes in the morning before coffee.

It was clearly time for us to just act like it was all totally normal. Fortunately this woman was smart and she watched me carefully doing exactly what I did, removing her shoes and metal stuff and packing it all in her bin like a real travelling pro. We breezed by the TSA people, who at 5:15 AM were looking remarkably like fellow people without coffee. I believe I could have gone right through with my pet Tyrannosaurus and they wouldn't have blinked. Or maybe my course was being guarded because my actions were just.

Whatever the reason, we got to the correct exit gate and I gestured for her to sit. I checked with the gate person, filling her in on the situation so the lady could board with me and I could see her to her seat. The gate person offered to move her up to seat 5C from the back of the plane so she was close. Clearly good deeds were a contagious phenomena. I thanked her and we switched out the ladies boarding pass. I got her onto the plane, stowed her carry on bag above for her, and took my seat 1D in 1st class going right to sleep. Sleeping is my favorite thing to do on a plane, especially at 5:30 AM and before coffee.

We got to Detroit and I waited for her at the door, then we walked to the nearest monitor and I checked her destination flight. It turned out she was flying to Evansville, Indiana not to India! I could have sworn the NW person told me India, but I'm famous for not hearing things. OK, it's Indiana. That means terminal C. We are in terminal A. So we walked the forever walk from Terminal A to C, riding the five moving walkways, going down the big escalator, doing three more moving walkways through the weirdly beautiful light and sound art tunnel in between, then up another really big escalator, and finally we arrived at terminal C. That's when I saw that she was in the very last gate in C. I'm talking this is the last gate on Earth. We rode six more moving walkways while I tried to monitor my walking speed so I didn't go too fast, but the little lady dogged my heels the whole way never more than two feet behind me. I got her to the correct gate, again gestured for her to sit and be comfortable, and explained to another NW employee what the woman's situation was and how I had become involved.

This woman also thanked me profusely and promised to put her in the correct seat personally so she would feel secure and looked after. I left feeling pretty good about doing a good deed. I waved goodbye to her and she also waved but in addition she did that praying hands in front of you bowing gesture that in India shows deep thanks and gratitude. I returned the gesture because it's cool and it seemed both polite and appropriate.

I looked back a bit later and she was still waving good bye so I waved again feeling even better for helping her, but as I walked out of the airport it really came to me how incredibly privileged I had been that morning.

I was given the opportunity to guide a stranger in a strange land through a difficult situation and to be sure that she arrived back to her family safely and that she felt secure and cared about by the people in that strange land.

It was an awesome and humbling feeling because I really had just wanted to see her get to her destination and it seemed such a small sacrifice to make on my part so she could get there. I really hadn't thought about how frightening it must have been for her and for her family too. I mean heck I knew what my intentions were but for them it must have been a real leap of faith, or perhaps desperation, to accept my help.

I really hoped I would get an email from the son, just telling me his mom had made it safely to Indiana, but I didn't. It's not that I wanted thanks, I just wanted to hear than my erstwhile travelling companion had indeed made it safely back to her family in Indiana. I have faith that she made it though and I did my best to be sure she would. I know I'd sure want someone to help my mom out in a similar situation.

As Anne Herbert said, "Practice random acts of kindness, and senseless acts of beauty."

They are fun and they make you feel really really good.